So I hear that England is a pretty swinging forien country where they speak English. So that's where I'm headed for the next month or so. I hope to bring you back some stories of poverty among the hipster youth in a land known for kick-ass pop and bad teeth.
Stay Tuned!
I'm working at the liquor store right now. I haven't seen a customer in about an hour. The television is my only source of entertainment.
While flipping through the TV listings I came across the following:
Dog the Bounty Hunter - "Stress Management"
Dog persues a fugitive at a homeless shelter and has a confrontation with the staff; makes a capture that turns violent and has a romantic dinner with Beth.
I've been up since 5 which is probably why I think that's the funniest thing in the world.
This exists.
I don't know why it exists but it does.
People have too much time on their hands in the first world.
I wrote a while ago about how I was super excited for Mega Shark Vs. Giant Octopus. I have seen it now and folks, I am dissapointed. How could I be dissapointed with something that promised to be so delightfully god awful? Because, ladies and gentlemen, when I set out to see a film about a shark that can chomp the Golden Gate Bridge in half - I don't need to know why he does it. Is it too much to ask for more giant creatures and less science trying to explain why they're giant? It's not "The Manchurian Candidate". Although maybe that would have been a better movie if Denzel crushed enemy submarines with his tentacles.
Jeeze Shakespeare! This is just getting ridiculous. 2 in one speech? Come on! We expect better of you...
Henry VI Act 3 Scene 7
TALBOT
Where is my other life? mine own is gone;
O, where's young Talbot? where is valiant John?
Triumphant death, smear'd with captivity,
Young Talbot's valour makes me smile at thee:
When he perceived me shrink and on my knee,
His bloody sword he brandish'd over me,
And, like a hungry lion, did commence
Rough deeds of rage and stern impatience;
But when my angry guardant stood alone,
Tendering my ruin and assail'd of none,
Dizzy-eyed fury and great rage of heart
Suddenly made him from my side to start
Into the clustering battle of the French;
And in that sea of blood my boy did drench
His over-mounting spirit, and there died,
My Icarus, my blossom, in his pride.
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